Empty Bookshelf Reviews

telling you what to think since aught-five.

People Who Say “Cheers” Instead of “Goodbye”

By Dan on June 3rd, 2007


21 comments

Special note on the title: I figured that there must be an opposite of the word "greeting," and it turns out it's "valediction." Instead of using a houty-touty word such as that, I've grouped everything into the serves-all "goodbye." You're welcome.

I saw some of the MTV Movie Awards tonight, and Johnny Depp, accepting Best Performance for Pirates of the Caribbean 2 (Piratey-Boogaloo), did the normal awards-show spiel after receiving a lengthy standing ovation from the audience. Nothing out of the ordinary... except, instead of ending his speech with "thanks," "bye," or even the 'look at me, I'm World traveller' and I want you to know it, "Ciao," he dropped this gem: "Cheers." What is this world coming to. And that's not a question. Given the wide variety of ways to say "goodbye" (even some that serve to combine it with a "thanks" aspect), he has to give the trendy, pretentious "cheers."

euro
Cheers, hippy

Let Johnny Depp serve as an example for the problems with the phrase, but his usage was no more egregious than any others'. I take exception with this expression for three reasons:
1) "Cheers" is a drinking-related saying. That's fine, but this what at an awards show, not a restaurant. It wasn't even the Golden Globes which (obviously) serves alcohol. This is the biggest issue - it makes no sense.
2) It reeks (REEKS!) of Eurotrash and, even worse, Americans who wish they were Eurotrash. You know these people - they refer to manual transmissions as "standard" and call elevators "lifts" just so you can make a weird face at them to which they respond by saying these exact words (every time): "I was in London, and that's what they call them in London."
3) I'd like to take credit for being part of the cusp of the expression "not so much." In fact, my earliest documented utterance of the phrase was way back in July of 2004. I challenge anyone to beat that. I'm not claiming to be first, but I'd like to think I beat any of you seven reading this to the punch. How is this related to "cheers?" Well, tangentially at best. I guess I'm just a little bitter, and my lexicographic warning radar is going of like crazy about the soon-to-be "cheers" phenomenon. Consider this my warning to people who want to keep European lingo where it belongs.



People Who Say "Cheers" Instead of "Goodbye" get ZERO stars. The English language has hundreds of thousands of words, and provides myriad tools for making up words (such as "spamera" - n. a digital camera used to take pictures which will later be e-mailed to everyone the camera owner knows, but no one will look at. Usage: "Yeah, my mom is unfortunately bringing her spamera to my nephew's pre-school graduation next weekend, so I'm definitely going to spend time familiarizing myself with the delete button in my e-mail program.") Hmm. That's actually a pretty good made-up word. Anyway. Lots of words, easy to make-up new ones. Does the bowel of the English language that is the British dialect really need to be given a colonic every time someone decides that he's too cool for "bye" or "thanks?"

Written by Dan

June 3rd, 2007 at 9:46 pm

21 Responses to 'People Who Say “Cheers” Instead of “Goodbye”'

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  1. I use “cheers” literally dozens of times a day. I prefer it over “goodbye” and “later” but maybe not as much as “Yipee-Ki-Yay-Motherfucker” which just never seems to flow naturally into conversation.

    I’m OK with this. Unlike Super-Mario, I’m don’t need an excess amount of stars to feel invincible — that’s where my pretentiousness (and small arms collection) come into play.

    [insert smiley emoticon]

    Cheers,
    Rick

    Rick

    4 Jun 07 at 11:36 am

  2. Cheers insead of thanks is very annoying. In Canada here, if someone uses cheers over thanks, they are likely:

    Young, “alternative”, pro hemp, heavy pot smoker, of less than average intelligence, unaware that the phrase is annoying and unable to understand why, unaware we are not in the United Kingdom, and that cheers should be reserved for a toast right before you clang your glasses together.

    A girl at the local gas station uses cheers all day long – I like to hang around the store a bit and watch as people react sometimes; the best was the old farmer who said “did I just have a drink and not know it?”

    No Cheers Please

    19 Jul 08 at 8:33 am

  3. Its amazing how fast its spread! A few years ago a South African accountant working for me here in the U.S. always said it, and I’d never heard it — or at least noticed it before. I moved to another state, and got in the habit of using it, but mostly just in email/online. Then in the last year I’ve started hearing it more and more, since its mostly from people I regularly deal with. I thought maybe they had gotten infected from me. But it sounds like its a nationwide phenomenon? I ain’t that popular! So I guess I likely had little to do with it spreading around here. Sounds like a nationwide meme.

    Guess I’ll kick the habit then!

    Susan

    31 Aug 08 at 11:11 pm

  4. Susan, we truly appreciate your commitment to ridding yourself (and by extension), our planet of this linguistic nightmare.

    Dan

    1 Sep 08 at 4:42 pm

  5. I totally agree with you. Enough with the “Cheers”.

    Dave

    23 Sep 08 at 9:11 pm

  6. “Cheers” is the same as fuck off….

    MASAI

    2 Oct 08 at 4:54 pm

  7. Normal person: “Hey Bob, thanks for that report you sent me the other day, really helped a lot”

    Eurotrash wannabe: “Oy cheers mate”

    Normal person: “FUCK YOU EUROTRASH WANNABE RETARDED CHEERS-SAYING ASSHOLE”

    Eurotrash wannabe: “cheers mate”

    Normal person: “DIE MOTHERFUCKER DIEEEEEE”

    **eurotrash wannabe motherfucker dies shortly thereafter in a horrible lift accident**

    Brad

    3 Dec 08 at 2:22 pm

  8. A lot of cursing, but I like the enthusiasm.

    Dan

    4 Dec 08 at 1:27 pm

  9. A quick point before the assumed master of the English language and all things related to saying good bye edits the blog – there are in fact hundreds of thousands of words in the English language.

    There – I win.

    Up with all things European and down all things American

    Cheers!

    Kevin

    4 Dec 08 at 3:38 pm

  10. How odd – the article seems to say “hundreds of thousands.” It’s too bad I’m not the type that would go back and correct something I had wrong on an earlier draft. A real shame that I’m not the type of person to do such a thing.

    Dan

    4 Dec 08 at 3:41 pm

  11. The Post made by a Mr. Kevin was in fact added after an edit to the “English Language” comment. Dan Clearly Wins, now get me some little ice.

    Kermit the Frog

    4 Dec 08 at 3:42 pm

  12. In Canada I’ve noticed A LOT people in the guitar scene saying “cheers”, I guess it’s a British thing since a lot of great guitarist came from there and they use it over there in Britain? Well personally I think when someone uses the word “cheers” they seem to be trying to be something their not (posers) unless you come from a region where “cheers” is a commonly used word. But if your in Canada I don’t think you should use it, just say goodbye. And cheers sounds gay anyway.

    Gutiar Player

    27 Dec 08 at 1:08 pm

  13. It’s a multi-purpose word you ignorant close minded feeble witted imbeciles. To treat it like it’s an iniquitous phrase is ridiculous. Spamera is a good a made up word? One of your lemmings characterized people who use the phrase cheers as displaying less intelligence, and you want to argue that spamera is a good word. If its a gay sounding word, it’s spamera. Anyone, who hangs out at a gas station to hear a phrase they don’t like so they can giggle to themselves whilst some honky, white trash, gun toting redneck can make a stupid snarky remark about a mysterious drink clearly has issues. Like, admit yourself because you’re a deranged, child molesting necropheliac issues. You so called Canadians babbling about how it shouldn’t be used in Canada. Meanwhile, we’re governed by a monarchy. Honestly, you guys, representing the opposition, are retarded.

    Steve

    10 May 09 at 7:27 pm

  14. Who cares how people say goodbye.

    matt

    24 Jun 09 at 9:46 pm

  15. Thank you for writing this article! I was worried I was alone and did a quick google search which landed me here.
    People can say what they want, but when that includes
    *”Cheers”, especially in parting and faux-offhandedly
    *Monty Python zingers
    *nauseating nu-music jargon descriptives (eg “shoegaze”)in excess
    or
    *horrid fake British accents
    it makes me want to punch them in the face and they should expect nothing less than me barely restraining my fists. That’s all I can offer.
    Cheers?
    Go eat a bag of dicks.

    Amanda

    10 Jul 09 at 7:21 pm

  16. Triple-U sponsor of the day.. People who say “Cheers”

    I hate reading message boards and seeing people ending posts with “cheers”. So much so that I had to google it and see if I was the only one. Thank God I’m not.

    I HATE “Cheers”. It reeks of false supereriority and smugness. 98% of the people who say it only say it because they think it makes them look intelligent and high class; while in reality you really look like an ASS.

    I’m out.

    Kevin

    11 Jul 09 at 12:58 pm

  17. The English language needs a good word for goodbye — something that has that feeling of talk to you later, take care, and bye all rolled into one. Bye doesn’t cut it. Ttyl doesn’t either. Take care is a bit much. Cheers tries to fill in the gap. Sure it’s odd to most American ears. Ciao is probably the same for many. But they are one-syllable words that convey something our one-syllable goodbyes (Bye, for example) don’t really have. Let’s not get jingoistic, xenophobic or chauvinistic about this people! And what’s with you English language snobs using crude language? To me it automatically destroys any credibility that your argument may have…

    Daniel

    25 Sep 09 at 2:35 pm

  18. Dan: I know it’s two words, but either “hang on” or “hang in” does if for me. If there is reason for concern “hang in there” seems appropriate.

    chuck

    17 Oct 09 at 12:31 pm

  19. Only Wankers use the word Cheers its pathetic slang from England,some people think its a cool way of saying goodbye,but as commented before,its actually a nice way of telling someone to Fuck Off.

    Karl

    1 Nov 09 at 9:31 am

  20. I’ve just received an e mail from a particularly irritating colleague in England who really winds me up when he signs off e mails with Cheers….. as if we are in the pub or everyone is his mate. It’s just wrong. I concur with everything said above. With thanks,

    Zoe

    26 May 10 at 10:27 am

  21. I’m completely thankful to each and every one of you for noticing the increased use and abuse of this stupid word. I began noticing this phenomenon in 2004 and I have lost seconds off my life every time someone uses it as a send off, when a simple fucking “goodbye” or a shallow “take care” would have sufficed. FUCK! And for all you who say it, why, why, why, why???? Knock that shit off!! You sound like morons!

    Cheers, Fuck face!

    Mark

    5 Aug 10 at 5:40 pm

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