Empty Bookshelf Reviews

Category: Movies

  • The Empty Bookshelf Guide to the 2019 Oscars

    Another year, another set of movies! JoJo Rabbit Authoritarianism = bad Brainwashing youths = bad Nazis = bad Hitler being a brainwashed kid’s invisible friend = an irreverent take on the above. But it’s not singularly great. Next movie, please. Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood It’s a movie about movie-dom. The Oscars love that […]

  • The Empty Bookshelf Guide to the 2018 Oscars

    And we’re back at it, again! The Best Picture nominees in alphabetical order… BlacKkKlansman It’s Ricky Jerret from Ballers! Kylo Ren! And they bring it. This is a simple movie (Black guy cons his way into the KKK, including a personal relationship with James Duke), with complex details throughout. It takes place not in the […]

  • The Empty Bookshelf Guide to the 2017 Oscars

    There was but one of these guides previously, due to that being the only year I saw all the Best Picture nominees once the field was expanded beyond 5, and/but I also saw all of them in 2017. Let’s do this (in alphabetical order). Call Me By Your Name A 25 year-old initiates a sexual relationship […]

  • The Harry Potter Book Series

    I read* the Harry Potter books this summer. Harry Potter fans and superfans, if there’s something I’m missing or being unfair about, let me know. *Note: For those with strong opinions about that word, I’ll point out I actually books-on-taped it during hiking trips. I’d say it’s 85-90% of the experience of actually reading it. […]

  • The Morgan Freeman Presidential Saga Trilogy: Olympus Has Fallen/Deep Impact/Oblivion

    When Return of The Jedi came out in 1983, nobody expected to wait 16 years for another Star Wars movie to poorly detail what life was like a couple dozen years before the Second Death Star blew up. If the announcement of the prequels to these years-old films was a geek shot-heard-round-the-world, then what 2013 […]

  • The Muppets

    The Muppets have always been a big inspiration to me. I grew up watching reruns of The Muppet Show, the 9 episodes of The Jim Henson Hour that aired before it was cancelled, the movies, Muppet Babies, Fraggle Rock, Sesame Street and countless other productions. Muppet Christmas Carol is one of my favorite movies ever, […]

  • Drive

    How far can you take the idea of creating a nondescript character before you have one that is boring and unlikeable? That’s the argument that’s running through my head as I write about the new Ryan Gosling vehicle (literally), “Drive”. “Drive” is the story of a mechanic/Hollywood stunt driver/robbery wheelman, who operates under a strict […]

  • The Empty Bookshelf Guide to the 2010 Oscars

    This won’t be a guide to all of the awards, but we’ll get through all of the important ones. I’m structuring this as an “Empty Bookshelf Guide” and selectively using the royal “we,” though I’ve not consulted with the Junior Staff for their opinions. The format will be listing the ten Best Picture nominees, and […]

  • 2010 Academy Awards

    Alec and Steve were the only friends left at “Oscar’s” birthday party after mom kicked Kratos out after “the incident.” Some quick thoughts opinions: The “interpretive” dancing to accompany the Best Music (Original Score) nominees was tacky and plain-old ridiculous. Being that the music was written for a movie, why not show either a) a […]

  • Urgent Warning Review: The Last Templar

    Later tonight, NBC will be showing the second half of the two part “The Last Templar” mini-series. DO NOT WATCH THIS. It’s rare that I feel tasked to present my opinion as a public warning, but it is entirely, absolutely necessary in this case. I’m not proud of myself, but I fell for the “well, […]